The roommate... who accused me of attempted murder pt. 2

Read part 1 first... duh.


So I walked to residence life debating all the things I could get in trouble for.  The only thing I could think of was invasion of privacy?  So I held my head up high and continued towards the office building. When I got there, Nikky (head of Res. Life) looked PISSED! Obviously Charlie had gotten to her first and I thought to myself, "god only know what lies he's told to make me look like shit".





Being a naive freshman the first thing I said was "I didn't do it" and waited for a response, well Charlie EXPLODED.  he said something like:


"I can't fucking believe you would try to poison me, thats messed up, you fucking cum sucking slut bag" the look on my face had to be priceless! I had NO idea what he was talking about,  Poison? people still do that?


I quickly asked him to elaborate and he went on to say that as soon as he got back to the room, he knew something was different, so he checked all his shit and he accused me of:


1. Spraying Fabreeze in his cereal
2. Covering his shoes in Purell hand sanitizer
3. Writing "Fuck You" in dust on his picture frames


 I was so confused, I could not remember doing ANY of that, the more I thought about it, the more it bothered me. I didn't do any of that!  I just assumed he was lying, in hopes to get me kicked out of his room but it still bothered me, so I invited Jay over again.


After a long afternoon of cum filled butt sex, I asked him if I could ask him a serious question (that sentence was horrible in structure). He of course said yes,  I think he thought I was gonna propose or something because he got teary eyed, anyways, I flat out asked him if he had been responsible for

1. Spraying Fabreeze in Charlies cereal

2. Covering his shoes in Purell hand sanitizer

3. Writing "Fuck You" in dust on his picture frames

Jay quickly fessed up to doing all three of those things. I asked him why and he said "we could fuck more if the loser moved out". To make a long story short, Jay never came to visit again, we just had all of our sex adventures outside.